An Ode to Paul La Gambina; My Dad, My Heritage, My Roots
You might be wondering how this article relates to interior design, styling or colour, but if you read this account about my dad Paul La Gambina, you’ll understand how and why I am the person I am today. It’s also something that I’d love to share.
It would have been dad’s 75th Birthday today. It would have been a big celebration. He would have organised a party and invited his family to join him for food, cakes, drinks, laughs and music. But dad passed away nearly 10 years ago now, so this won’t be happening. Very sadly.
Instead, I’ll be visiting my mum in the house where she lives that was originally the house that she and my dad helped me to buy many years ago, and we did it up together as a family. It was an experience that I’ll treasure forever. I’m taking the oval almond cakes with an almond on top that my dad used to like, and we’ll (hopefully, weather permitting) sit in the garden, talk and reminisce.
My dad came from humble beginnings in Siculiana, Sicily, son of a farmer and farmer’s wife and one of eight children (one of his middle names is Octavio to mark this.) He moved to the UK at 14 in search of work and a better life. He couldn’t speak English when he arrived, and for this he was bullied at school. He lived with one of his sisters and then brothers who had already moved here for the same reasons, and his life as Paul La Gambina (leaving Paolo behind) began.
He tried his hand at anything. His main aim was to work, earn and to be able to move his parents to the UK, so they too could have a better life and ultimately reuniting the family. During his early years in the UK, he was a waiter, an ice cream man and then a tailor. He began learning the craft of tailoring as a young boy in Sicily, when students learned a trade after school. He later completed his Diploma in bespoke tailoring from The Tailor & Cutter Academy (London) in 1964 and after working his way up at various tailoring businesses in Stoke on Trent, he thought ‘why do this for someone else, when I can be doing it for myself, my way.’
My mum was a tailoress at Bladen’s in Hanley and that’s where they met. They fell in love, married (against all odds, but that’s another story!) and set up their first business that my mum still refers to as ‘the shed in Hanley’ - it was a tiny shop. And that’s where the magic began.
They had no business experience, only their craft. They forged their path by learning lessons from their failures and mistakes. The word spread about their on-point tailoring and unrivalled talent within the area, and the people came. These people included Peter Shilton (footballer), Phil Taylor (darts), Ray Reardon (snooker), Eric Bristow (darts), Garth Crooks (footballer) Alan Hudson (footballer) and later, the complete Port Vale football team, and many more who had a penchant for dressing sharp and owning an item that was bespoke and individual to them.
Dad got into his stride, he proved to be a people person, and his customers would visit him as much for the chats as well as the clothes. He was a perfectionist, he worked late, 6 days most weeks in the early days. He was obsessed with his work and creating the absolute best every single time. He only ever stopped working when he reached burn out point, and he’d have to stay in bed for a few days to recover. Their business grew and they moved to larger and larger premises that offered ready-to-wear as well as bespoke clothing.
He wore loud clothing, abstract knitwear, apricot cotton trousers, patterned shirts like you never knew could exist, socks with sandals, bright silk ties and of course, the crispest, most dapper well-made suits in the most luxurious fabrics you’ve ever seen. When I was a young teenager, his apricot trousers and crazy shirts would embarrass me…but it didn’t last for long. I knew that my dad was different to other dads. He loved colour, it was part of his heritage and moreover, he wasn’t about to give a damn what people thought. He was the boss, he was the tailor, he could wear what he wanted and people would love it!
The apricot trousers, with one of his favourite shirts.
He had outrageous handwriting, he liked to throw random capital letters into words. His accent was the perfect combination of Sicilian-Stoke, he was charismatic, silly, professional, effervescent and you’d certainly hear his voice and feel his presence in a room. He was also moody, sometimes quiet, and he had a short fuse (particularly with pubescent teenagers!), but, he never showed anger towards his work. If something wasn’t going his way, he would do it again and again until he got it right and never sighed or had a fit about it. He had a can-do attitude about everything and I’ll never meet anyone with a work ethic like his.
He loved Italy and his culture, the food, the wine, the ice cream, the sun, the sea and we were lucky to take trips to Italy as a family many times. He would turn on the TV and watch a film from part way through. When pudding was offered after tea, he would answer with ‘I’d like a bit of each!’ (I absolutely inherited his sweet tooth!) he respected his parents and put his family first all the time.
He was an encouraging and supportive dad, he believed in me, he egged me on and he always knew the right thing to say and do in a crisis. He was a protector, a great source of advice and an endless resource of knowledge.
I remember something very clearly when I called my boyfriend at the time to tell him the news of my dad passing. Amongst his many responses he said ‘But, all that knowledge…’ and I knew exactly what he meant. This was the end of his amazing knowledge and experience, and it was a devastating thought.
He didn’t just love his work he had an absolute passion for it, and if someone didn’t like it he would show them the door and the route to the competition. He held no prisoners and took NO s**t! He said exactly what he meant, clearly, and stood up for his values and beliefs. This was one of the most remarkable things about my dad, he was unapologetically himself.
Altering a pair of trousers using my sewing machine at my first flat in Didsbury. Their machines were in storage as they were about to move to Crete, so he did this as a last minute favour to a customer before leaving.
A younger Laura was the stark opposite to this. I always wondered why I wasn’t as strong as my dad when it came to uncomfortable situations, especially where I would have to stand up and defend myself, or be seen. It would bother me that I didn’t have more of his fierce Sicilian genes. But the more I talk with my mum about my dad in his youth, the more I understand that he wasn’t always the pillar of strength that he later became. He was quiet because he was young and learning. And the more he knew and learnt, the more self-assured he became in himself and his ability, which over time allowed the confident and tenacious man to evolve.
He was not only a designer of dapper suits, he could design Anything. He could create something functional and beautiful from a pile of junk in front of him because of the vision that he had, that no-one else could see. He was a DIYer, he made our houses into castles, and with a dash of Sicilian gaud, which I loved. He made things well, and he’d learn new skills during every room he transformed. If he washed a saucepan after use or wiped down the kitchen surface, he’d do it thoroughly, as he believed that no job should be done half hearted.
Another remarkable colour combination.
Each time I plant a flower in my back yard, paint a wall, do any job, I think about dad and how he would do it and it encourages me to do the job the best I can, using lessons I’ve learned through him and through life.
My dad taught me many things, way too many for me to list here, but these are the key learnings that I want to share with you as I think they are very relevant to a lot of us right now in the wake of Covid-19, the brink of a recession and the upmost importance of the Black Lives Matter movement.
Work hard. Actually work hard, in the old school sense of the meaning, like blood, sweat and tears, night and day if you have to. Only then are you deserving of the result.
Determination. Do not give up. Keep going and keep learning and you will get there.
Never get angry towards your work. Mistakes are lessons for next time.
To do you best and be the best, you must have DESIRE. He loved this word. What he meant is that everybody wants success, that’s obvious, but not everyone has the true desire, backbone and grit to be successful. To be the best, having the desire will set you apart. I dream that if he was here today, he would see that I have the same desire as he did. I actually do dream about that.
Speak up, and speak with confidence. If you don’t ask you don’t get.
Stand up for what you believe in and be true to your values. I will.
I wanted to share this with you because a lot of what I’m doing and trying to get across in my work is the irrefutable importance to be your authentic self, not just within your interior but in life. If it helps that you start with your interior, in a space and environment where you feel most comfortable and safe, then perfect. It is after all your space, and you should feel completely yourself and at ease there.
Some of us may find it hard to be truly ourselves on a daily basis when in the company of others that we don’t feel comfortable around, or with those that don’t understand us. This is particularly relevant for introverts (myself included) who can sometimes find it difficult to work through the often ‘shouty’ crowd and find clarity, or a moment to get a word in. But we have to try. We must try.
As I get older, those Sicilian genes that I thought I didn’t inherit are surfacing, they were just buried deep inside because I suppose during my youth, like my dad’s, I was inexperienced and still learning. I have little or no time for certain attitudes and certain people, and this feeling has been achieved through my experiences of work, friendships and relationships.
The most influential man and woman I’ll ever know.
It’s so important to be yourself and be true to yourself, and if that means wearing apricot or cobalt blue trousers with crazy shirts, then great! If it means painting your living room fuchsia pink with bells on, even better! And if it means having a difficult conversation with a friend, colleague or stranger then so be it. It’s not going to be easy, and I have by no means mastered it, but the more we do it, and the more experience we gain through doing it, it will become second nature.
Thanks for being so fantastic dad and passing on these valuable life lessons to me and my sisters, and Happy Birthday xxx
*Disclaimer - There has been no editing to the image saturation, Paul La Gambina’s clothes were this bright.
P.S. Remember, ‘The early bird catches the fish.’
Taken on a trip around Tuscany.
